Writing

I have been extremely busy. My Daughter was finally born on January 12th and I cannot tell you what I have gotten done since then. I am constantly paying attention to her, but I love it. She is perfect.

She is currently taking a nap and I decided, why not get on the old blog and type a little. It’s been so long since I have been on here.
I currently am reading a book which some would say I am too old for, but, FUCKIT! I liked the way the excerpt on the back sounded. It’s called Asylum and I am thoroughly obsessed with reading it. I really love ghost stories I suppose, and so far, this one has sucked me in.

It finally occurred to me after putting it down today that reading fuels my writing. When I read for a short period of time, my thoughts sound as if they have been written in a book or something. I hear myself thinking in the form of an authors words. My verbiage makes more sense. It makes me WANT to write something. In fact. I think I will make this a daily habit again.

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This is Your Life.

If you could read a book containing all that has happened and will ever happen in your life, would you?                           If you chose to read it, you must read it cover to cover.

No.

Absolutely not. I don’t want to know what happens, or when I die, because it would just drive me crazy my whole life. I knew a few days ago that my Horse was going to be put down, because he could not walk, was 25 and had multiple tumors, and I felt as if I was counting down the hours that I had left with him. I feel that if I knew every little detail in my life, it would be the same. I would be counting down the hours, and worry about how much time I have left. There would be no purpose for me to live it, or I would be constantly trying to change it. I also would not want to be reminded of the past. I wouldn’t want to read over those chapters of my life again in which I do not want to repeat. There are many images and feelings I bury deep and do not wish to uncover ever again. I feel that opening that book would only bring a lot of pain. Don’t misunderstand, there are PLENTY of times where I am struggling and I just wish I knew the outcome of something before it actually happened, but honestly, sometimes, I just think its better to NOT know, and figure it out as you go.

Tell me now dear friend, would YOU open that book?